Strings

Ana Teresa Barboza

We should say goodbye.

Yes, I know it's almost Christmas time and all you we want so see is snow, reindeers and bokeh effects. But it's sad when it's still autumn time in our calendars, all we do is think about winter. We had waited for golden autumn to come some months ago and it's cruel just to ignore her, not saying goodbye. And because I didn't publish here any set of my autumn's photos, I decided to do it now. Just to show some respect to nature's resources. And the autumn is one of them.

I'm lazy so some of them had a little effect-tuning, some of them not. Hope you enjoy it a little.

And the autumn lady to say goodbye to fallen leaves.

Wish you a good night, speak to me in comments.

Blogging thought AGAIN and healing then...

this drawing does't match to this part of my post
but it looks nice here

Well, a blogging problem is a hard thing to deal with. Sometimes I wanna be a style blogger just like the most of you, but I don't have enough patience and time to follow all those posts of yours, to spend time only on looking for this kind of inspirations. But it's so cool to be a blogger who posts regularly and gets lots of comments. I'm jealous when I look at all those sites with lots of followers. I know that you have to work for fame ;)) and I'm not sure if it's so worth for me... But having a style blog with your photos and comments is a good way to catch the moments of your life. I do not trust digitality, but who knows - maybe it really saves the memory?

I've also got a problem with categorizing my writings. I have many blogs, I'm an addict, and every single one of them was made for different kind of posting. I'm not sure which things I prefer to describe in Polish, which in English (soon it will be possible to write in French, oh mon dieu...) so usually I just don't write, because making a decision is so tiring...;) And I can see that I'm not fluent in writing and finding best words, everything is some kind of harsh. I was a good writer once, I was good at imagining and describing things. I was happy doing this.

I have to admit that blogging is very important for me. I've blogged since I've got and Internet. Almost nine years passed. I love blogs. I love blogging word. But it's all so chaotic...

But for today I think I will just be my kind of blogger. I'm me. My life is mine. My inpirations are inspiring me. And if I'm not able to be a frequent "poster" (yes, for example I love word-metaphor games), to let you know of my everyday style, inspirations, looks, finds, reads, eats... well. I have to cope with eat. Deal with it. Make myself like my blogging way and wait patiently with hope for your words and presence.

[wow, I've got a good reflections day today... I just made myself think that when I'm bored at work I don't have to check e-mail and facebook thousand times per hour. I can READ ARTICLES on the Internet, not LEAVING THEM FOR A BETTER TIME, when I'm more relaxed, more thoughtful...let's face it: I'm never more relaxed. Never more ready.]

Ok, no more speaking.

Mandalas found today. Clear, delicate, fascinating Mark Golding's works.

“I’m back in the woods for another walk, this time I’m feeling really low, sad, helpless and I’m crying. I leave the woods and wander up into one of the surrounding meadows, find a clear open space and I sit upon a small hillock, with my head in my hands, and I cry, and cry, and cry.

From my despair I am aware of a presence around me, I look up, and 6 horses have wandered and gathered around me, looking into my soul, with understanding and empathy for my sorrow.

Two of the horses walk slowly towards me, one brown, one black, and press their noses upon my cheeks, and they breathe me. Their breath becomes my breath, and we 3 breathe together, as they heal me, as they understand my sorrow.

And for moments I can speak horse. From mind to mind we share communication, and they ease my suffering. This is a unique and magical moment in my life, and a crossroads in my recovery. We share common experiences of love, pain and suffering in a communion of souls, a communion that knows none of the parameters of conventional understanding and this breaks down a barrier within my soul, that had hitherto separated me, Mark the human being, from the majesty and unity of the animal kingdom.”

M.Golding

Better to look at only one picture first. Looking on them together can blur the effect.

I have to find time to try it. And patience. Definitely patience.

Places

It's the last afternoon at home and I feel really sad. Tomorrow I return to my rented room. It's nearby, but nothing's better than your own quiet and comfortable place. I hate changes. I sit and think about moving, about changing locations, about how I want to have a cosy place just for my own. Yes, maybe I'm too young for this. It's time of rented flats, taming with discomfort, sharing place with other people. That's how it goes.
Today I'm running all the time into beautiful pictures of charming rooms, interior designs...and I almost feel pain in my chest.
So instead of interior photos I choose to look at outdoors.

And as I'm going to study French from this year and because I'll probably never go there because of my  anxiety, I choose Canal du Midi...
I've always prefered imagination than reality.

















Canal du Midi  (May 24, 1681). It connects the Garonne (near Toulouse) and the Mediterranean port of Sète. From December 7, 1996 is under the patronage of UNESCO.

And put it in your pocket...

I had a fight with my boyfriend yesterday's evening, but what good came with it is that he phoned me late at night to say that tonight, stars are massively falling down. I've never liked looking at the sky. It seemed boring to me and recently because of my anxiety problem I cannot stand this huge space the sky is. I feel trapped and frightened thinking about it. Oh, and my neck hurts so much when I look up!:)

But yesterday, just to be nice for my boy, I've opened my attic's window and waited for the star to fall. Once I thought I saw it, but it was nothing than a quick, blurred flash. But then - what a performance! It was very quick, but the star's "tail" glimmered in my eyes long after. Such a unique feeling. I know, that maybe for you, my dreamgirls and bloggers, it's an obvious experience. But I felt it for the first time and it was incredible.

Today, at our Polish sky it will be even more falling stars. It is said that about 1300 per hour! It's sad when think that the star ends their life like this. But that how it goes. 

Of course, I remembered to make a wish. What was it? No, I'm not afriad that if I tell you it won't come true. I thought about having a lot of magic moments in life. Yes, I dream about fairytales. And if they doesn't appear I will make them myself . As it is said here - it's all about power of your imagination.

I've got a nice nail laquer with silver glitter for my birthday. I think I will put it on for today star's show. Just in case someone wanted me to be his star this night...